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It's an issue I just have to live with if I want to be with him, and I do, so I live with it. From her summary, he just did not understand her dilemma at all. You have been blessed with the equipment to make such decisions. But it is luck of the draw. There's this fantasy perpetuated in the religion that if you're good and pure enough, that any man you meet would eventually see the truth and join the church for you. What a miserable state. She likely hasn't had many long-term relationships and has no idea what dynamics are involved in one. You don't have to believe them yourself, but you need that respect in thought as well as action, and you need to frame this as your own journey because you can only change yourself. Over two years ago I started dating my current boyfriend.
I think that if these two really care about each other that she should be told to take a moment and ask herself how she would feel if they break up over this and years later she finally researches her religion. There are many great and wonderful people in the church, and the real evil about the church is that it harms those great and wonderful people. If we do, I will be back to share my experiences. However, my situation is very different. Now I look at his job and his schedule and his tiredness as a part of both of our lives, rather than something that is just his life that I have to deal with. As the patriarchal leader, it will be up to you to figure it out and to dispel her unrealistic fantasies. Not all of us are able to achieve that ideal but we are to strive for it. I guess I was just hoping there was way for it to work.